Quick Takeaways

• Christian teaching tells us to examine the fruit of our actions; the documented outcomes of conversion therapy include family division, depression, and spiritual alienation.

• Scripture calls parents to protect their children and preserve family bonds, not to outsource that sacred responsibility to practitioners who profit from their fear.

• Faithful Christian parents across the country have found they can love God, honor their beliefs, and fully support their same-sex attracted or transgender children.

• Conversion therapy often damages the very faith it claims to protect, pushing young people away from God and their families.

Maybe someone at church handed you a brochure. Maybe a well-meaning relative suggested a program that promised results. Or maybe you found yourself searching late at night, wondering if there was something, anything, that could make this easier for your child and for your family.

Conversion therapy markets itself as the faithful choice. But faithful to what, exactly? Before signing up or writing a check, Christian parents deserve to know what the Bible actually teaches about protecting our children and preserving our families.

Lesson 1: Examine the Fruit

Christian teaching tells us to examine the fruit of our actions. Robert Cottrell, who has ministered to thousands of Christian families, puts it plainly: "The fruits of conversion therapy are unequivocally bad: destroyed individuals, fractured families, and damaged faith."

Research confirms what families experience firsthand. Young people whose parents tried to change their orientation showed attempted-suicide rates nearly triple those of peers who experienced no such interventions. When Exodus International, once the largest organization promoting these practices, shut down after acknowledging the harm they caused, the message was clear: there must be a better way.

Lesson 2: A Solution That Divides Families Is No Solution At All

Paulette Trimmer is a Pentecostal Christian who loves God and loves her son, Adam. When Adam came out as gay at 17, Paulette responded the way she thought a faithful mother should. "I looked at him, and I said, 'Adam, a man shall not lay with another man,'" she recalls, still crying years later. 

"Instead of getting love and support, I got scripture thrown at me," Adam remembers.

The Trimmers spent thousands on multiple conversion therapy programs. Each time one failed, they were told Adam was not trying hard enough. The programs did not change Adam's attractions. But they destroyed his relationship with his mother. 

"It killed it," Paulette says. "He didn't want to have anything to do with me."

Scripture calls us toward family unity, not practices that drive wedges between parents and children.

Lesson 3: Trust Your God-Given Parental Instincts

Paulette's decision to finally say "no" to a third program may have saved Adam's life. She listened to her mother's heart: "I don't know what they're teaching you, but it's killing our relationship."

That instinct was correct. You are the expert on your family. Scripture entrusts children to their parents for a reason. Be wary of anyone asking you to hand over that responsibility, especially when they are asking you to pay for the privilege.

Lesson 4: Fear Is Not From God

Linda Robertson and her husband did everything they thought loving Christian parents should do when their son Ryan came out. They found Christian therapists. They bought the books. They attended the conferences. "My goal was to do whatever I could to save my beloved child," Linda writes. "That meant finding Christian therapists and organizations who would recognize the threat that Ryan was facing."

But that response was rooted in fear, not faith. Susan Cottrell, who ministers to Christian families, offers counsel that might seem counterintuitive: "Let God be God. God will shake up, deconstruct, and reconstruct your faith." Her trust is grounded in a simple truth. "God is good," she says. "Fear is not from God."

Lesson 5: You Can Love God and Love Your Child

Paulette Trimmer remains a faithful Pentecostal Christian. She goes to church. She believes in God. She also loves and accepts her gay son. "I love God, I am not going to change that," she says. "And I love my son, and I'm not going to change that."

That is not a compromise. That is faith strong enough to withstand the pressure from church leaders and the promises of practitioners.

Today, faith-based organizations like the Association of Welcoming and Affirming Baptists, Fortunate Families, and the Family Acceptance Project help Christian families walk this path. These are communities of believers who have found that loving their children and loving God are the same calling.

Your child needs you. Not a practitioner, not a program. You.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Is conversion therapy considered a sin in Christianity?

A: The Bible does not mention conversion therapy directly. However, Scripture teaches us to examine the fruit of our actions. The documented outcomes of these practices, including family division and spiritual harm, conflict with the fruits of the Spirit.

Q: Can Christian parents support a gay or transgender child and still honor their faith?

A: Yes. Faithful Christians across denominations have found that supporting their child strengthens rather than compromises their faith. Organizations like Fortunate Families and the Association of Welcoming and Affirming Baptists exist specifically to help.

Q: What do major Christian organizations say about conversion therapy?

A: Exodus International, once the largest ministry promoting these practices, shut down in 2013 after acknowledging the harm caused to tens of thousands. Many denominations now oppose these practices.

Q: Does conversion therapy strengthen or harm family relationships?

A: Research consistently shows it harms families. The Family Acceptance Project found parental attempts to change a child's orientation are linked to higher rates of depression and family estrangement.

Q: Where can Christian families find faith-based support?

A: The Family Acceptance Project, Believe Out Loud, the Institute for Welcoming Resources, Fortunate Families, and the Reconciling Ministries Network all offer resources for families.